With the wedding coming up in 10 months, I can honestly say that there is only one thing that terrifies me.
Like I said I wouldn't, I have chosen to have my ceremony and reception outside. Yes, I have rented a tent. Yes, I am all over the farmer's almanac. And yes, I have a necessary but much less fabulous back-up plan.
What I am learning about myself though is tremendous.
I always thought I was a "go-with-the-flow girl." I am most comfortable in jeans and flip-flops. Whenever I can actually let my hair grow out past my shoulders, it is in a ponytail. I just have never been obsessed about some things... until now.
When Trey and I first talked about getting married, I was completely ready to pull a Carrie from Sex and the City and go to the courthouse. As we talked though, I did start to want all of my family and friends there to support us on that special day. I wanted to laugh, dance and celebrate with them. But as "the wedding" turns to "wedding planning," it just seems like so much work. Table linens, bands, china, rentals, dance floors, cakes, food, lighting, invitations, first dance songs, seating charts, aisle runners...
For someone who doesn't like to be controlling, the hardest thing to deal with is the uncontrollable.
If only I had been the girl who dreamed of my wedding day since I was 6. But I wasn't. Now that I am here, the options are staggering. Many people keep asking me what I want. I want my family there. I want to stand in front of my best friend and tell him just how much I am in love with him forever. That is it.
So here I am, not knowing what in the world I want, but knowing the only thing I do not want... is rain.